let's overanalyze nbc's new dracula trailer!

I’m going to start off by admitting that seriously analyzing a teaser trailer for a new television show is a fool’s errand. Two minutes and thirty seconds isn’t going to tell us much of anything about an entire season’s story arc, and depending on how the thing is edited, it may actually project a general tone that is absent from the final product.

Relationships between characters are touched upon for only the briefest of moments, like a bat’s wings brushing your cheek when you take an evening hike down into a gorge in your college days. No really, I hiked down into a gorge one night while the bats were hunting and one grazed my face when diving for a moth. Terrifying and creepy, if not just a little bit thrilling.

No, one can’t glean much of anything of substance from a show trailer apart from an overall sense of the production value. But it sure is fun to read into things sometimes, isn’t it? Join me after the jump and let’s do it together.

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the sport of youth and fashion of the age

In the twenty-four years I’ve been playing video games, I think I’ve become pretty well rounded. Platformers, RPGs, shooters, puzzlers, text-only, you name it—I’ve tried it. There is one chink in my armor, though, and it’s sports games.

My cousin was the only one in the family with a Super Nintendo growing up. I skipped that particular Nintendo console since I was embroiled in an ill-fated affair with the Sega CD, so I was always interested in playing it whenever I went to my aunt’s house. The only games my cousin had were Madden and NHL ’96. I had no idea what I was doing, and my cousin was having too much fun pummeling the noob to stop and give me tips. Thus began my hatred of sports games. I haven’t touched one since.

In the interest of bettering myself, I decided to seek out a sports gamer and get his or her perspective on the genre. Maybe then I could begin strengthening my gaming weakness. Fortunately, my friend Brandon Kelley was just the guy I was looking for, and sat down with me to discuss his gaming history and the finer points of the FIFA franchise.

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You are. You’re my man.

hugo weaving: more than a nerdy face

Here’s the thing about Hugo Weaving. He’s number one on the list. Yeah, that list. You know the one. Anyone who knows me will attest to the fickleness of my celebrity crushes, so depending on what time period of my life we’re dealing with, there are certain groups who will swear by my unimpeachable love of some actor or other, and none of them will be incorrect. But for all the number ones, only Hugo Weaving has come back around, time and time again, into the topmost of my good graces.

I’ve often been described as a girl who has “weird taste” when it comes to the physical attractiveness of men—”weird” mostly being used to qualify my complete lack of any rules of facial or body structure. There aren’t many who can predict a Sara Clemens crush. Here’s the rub, as Hamlet would say: it’s not about some quantifiable hair/eye/rugged-good-looking-ness that groups my man-crushes together—it’s mostly about talent.

A talented man is the man for me. That’s why Peter Dinklage exists on the same plane as Alan Rickman, why Damian Lewis (Homeland) is just as doable as Robert Webb (Peep Show).

Hugo Weaving’s talent is legit.

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nerdy reboot rumor mill

Paul regularly updates Unreality with news about Justice League and any of the happening/not happening Batman iterations, so I won’t be delving into any of that with this post. I will say I’m enjoying all the “Tom Hiddleston should be The Joker” petitions flying around the internet because A: I’m not on board with it (you can’t just plug the guy into all the comic book villain roles like he’s some kind of Ikea hex key, for Odin’s sake), and naysaying can be a good time, and B: there’s some really fun photoshoppery going on (though I much prefer this idea).

I have been following a few other movie rumors that I thought might just pique your interest, though, so why not add some grist to the metaphorical mill?

Note: I’m certainly not going to touch on every rumor revolving around every nerdy reboot idea, so I really would love to hear your thoughts on any films or franchises I don’t (or do) list.  Sound off in the comments!

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Pete? Pete Campbell?

Pete? Pete Campbell?

when did pete campbell become my favorite?

Don’t get me wrong, I still truly believe him to be the most punchable manchild on television, but there’s just something about Pete this season. Also keep in mind that when I say “favorite” I don’t mean the character with whom I most sympathize. That would be probably be one Mr. Ken Cosgrove, an all-around pretty good person who busts his hump in a New York City office every day and whiles away his leisure hours producing nerdy writings.

Pret-ty, pret-ty, pret-ty relatable.

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knights of badassdom, never reaching the end

One fateful day at San Diego Comic-Con 2011, a new trailer was born.

The future looked bright for the little trailer, and the big strong movie it was sure to become.

Well, perhaps not big and strong and good at sports. But smart and creative, handsome in its own special way, and sure to be the one in charge of things once it made it through high school.

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I’m Commander Shepard, and this is my favorite store on the Citadel.

Commander Shepard, Mass Effect 2